Preface: I fully encourage people to make their own meanings to songs. They are no less valid than the artist’s original intention. As such, I try and make my lyrics vaguely vague where possible.
If you’re reading this you very likely read the articles on my previous singles “He Doesn’t Deserve You” and “A History of Violence”. If not here’s a quick recap:
I wrote an EP at university about the most dysfunctional couple, who were still in love with each other despite the insults and the violence they would constantly hurl at each other. For the sake of ease we’ll call them Stuart and Carol after Kenny’s parents from south park, but they can be any gender you like.
“A History of Violence” is my third single but the middle song in the story where the couple start to see the harm the relationship is causing them and it all starts to break down. “He Doesn’t Deserve You” is my second single that deals with the fall out from the couple breaking up and deals with the jealousy and obsession of Stuart in his pathetic attempts to convince Carol to come back to him after she finds someone else.
“A History of Violence” was the song before “He Doesn’t Deserve You” on the University EP and “I Don’t Mind” comes before both of them, but has been released later due to production stuff (kiss my ass George Lucas).
Savvy?
Great.
“I Don’t Mind” is the last song on the Bon Voyeur EP. And if it took any longer it would have ended up on the next one. I have almost no qualms in outrightly saying this song was born to almost completely rip off Still Corners and more specifically “The Trip” and “Black Lagoon”. I was listening to these songs almost on repeat at this stage of university. They’re perfection and what any pop songwriter should strive for when writing a song. They create a peace and atmosphere that make you feel like you're sitting in a cosmic psychedelic retro collage in the style of the artist Mr. Babies. After listening to the songs repeatedly I had to identify the elements of the songs that made it, like the hypnotic consistency in the rhythm guitars, bass, drumming pattern and arpeggiated synth, heavily compressed and reverbed vocals and a higher end focus on the mix.
After setting up a drum loop on logic I started with an acoustic guitar. It was a prominent instrument in the still corners tracks and at the time I was going through a transition in to my solo work. I had also started a phase of playing with my acoustic tuned to D standard hoping to fall in line with Voltaire - an idol of mine. When I first started playing guitar I found a little arpeggio I liked playing that was so peaceful and I had been trying to put in to a song for years. I still haven’t managed, but the chord it’s based around still sounded great with the constant strumming method I was trying to emulate. After I had that I started playing around with chords that didn’t involve much change to keep up a drone on the high strings. Drones get a bad reputation and quite rightly in cases like Gregorian chanting and geography teachers, but they have found a way in to pop music in songs you wouldn’t expect like “Wonderwall” by Oasis and places you would like any Beatles song with a sitar and every time they are perfect for creating the atmosphere I was going for. With the chords I noodled out some quick lines for between the lyrics as a cool and response idea. Although the lyrics were the last thing written for the song, so the guitar lines were just meant to be place holders…that I got a little too attached to.
I had only recently bought an Arturia minicab to use to program the synths. It barely had a 2 octave range and I had next to no experience with playing keys besides some quick play arounds in the university practice rooms. With that in mind I knew it was going to be essential to the song to have a pad synth to create the my atmosphere. Knowing the chords I had played were roughly in D minor I started there and created a small building progression loop that I reversed for the chorus. With a little bend for flavour and to experiment a little more with the new equipment. With “The Trip” still in mind I wanted to get a nice arpeggiated synth to play through. It’s one of my favourite parts of the song and wanted to find my own way around it. After playing through plenty of ideas I found an idea I liked, however it wouldn’t fit although through the song, but I didn’t want to lose it completely after spending so long finding it. It turned out later when the song was nearly finished that the idea worked in the solo section and coda of the song. Like my old English teacher used to say “Never throw away a page of writing. It can always be recycled”. It took me years to realise he was just an environmentalist, but at that point the lesson had already stuck.
It was at this point I started to think I’d failed in my mission to rip off still corners. With the more distorted guitars and abrasive synths the song was starting to sound more like “Sacrifice” by London After Midnight. London After Midnight were a gothic music project from the 90’s I’d fallen in love with years ago. They are intertwined with The Doors as the soundtrack for a formative year in my life. With their obsession with movie soundtracks - their name being derived from a 1927 mystery film - and their dark takes on love I was seeing some parallels in what I was trying to create with the EP. So the similarity became less of a problem as I realised where it could work in my favour (though knowing I hadn’t hit my mark kind of got to me).
As part of the assignment we had to include certain things on the tracks. Either orchestra based instruments (violent, horns, cello etc), heavy backing vocal work or use of musique concrète. That’s why there’s violins in”He Doesn’t Deserve You” and all the extra backing vocals on “A History of Violence”. This was my chance to have done all 3. Musique concrète is the use of live recordings of more unusual things like trains, birds or restaurant conversations and manipulating them in to a composition. In “Sacrifice” in particular they used a thunder storm to show the turbulence of doomed love. Using this idea I could create foreshadowing towards the idea of the EP. All I had to do was manipulate a recording of a thunderstorm to fit better in the song. After a bit of playing I found I that the thunder blended in really well to the crash cymbals. At this point the song was almost writing itself.
With all the instruments and sections in place I finally started on the lyrics. A lot of the phrases where left other from my Burroughs method session as described in my “History of Violence” article. Mixing and matching lines lines I wrote with phrases from the engine - although this song contains more of my own lines than “History of Violence”. In truth I wasn’t as picky with the lines as I usually am, I had several deadlines to meet and wanted to focus on the sound and mood of the song. I did have some ideas going in to the song:
I wanted to use verses with an AAAA rhyming structure - something I always enjoy when Brian Molko does it.
I wanted to start reclaiming the word baby - ever since the Justin Beiber song I felt like the word was off limits despite it being in a lot of my favourite songs. MacGuffin Baby was written at the same sort of time.
I wanted to do a short chorus that tacks on to the end of the verses - this was more to spite my songwriting teacher who would often mark down my songwriting for having wordy uncatchy choruses.
And boom after roughly 4 years of development hell it’s finally out. It’s gone through a few changes including the lyrics, the added backing vocals from Georgia Holloway, the mid point solo and some added guitar chugs in the chorus (sound engineer James Feist’s idea), but it’s finally out and I hope you enjoy.
Now time for the next EP…
